Have you lost your mind?

Oh, the way an idea can roll in a mind so desperate for peace.  First, the stuffy nose and head cold led to an over sleeping episode.  After which I got to work in time to go for my walk and have lunch with the LG.  When I listened to my messages the big giant head had left me a scathing message regarding my most recent screw up.  The hair stood up on the back of my neck and I couldn't listen to the message.  I shivered at the thought of dealing with that kind of feeling at the onset of my day.  It occurred to me that this was my punishment for coming in late.

With that I looked down at the daily affirmation I had taped to the top of my computer..."Let Go"....I have been waiting for the past couple years for a sign of what in the world I am supposed to be doing with my life.  I may be completely nuts, but today I decided I am not waiting for any more signs.  I'm going out there and finding my calling, whatever it may be! 

I came right home and applied for 3 jobs through the career link system and created my resume.  I have no idea what may happen.  I am going to let the big giant head know that I am exploring my options.  I hope she doesn't fire me.  I really think that she'll be happy for me.  Who knows.

So, now I'm really excited.  I have a jittery kind of energy that makes me feel happy and enthusiastic.  I was imagining working at WalMart.  Wouldn't that be fun.  When I was in High School and College, I worked at a local retail chain and loved it!  I loved the crazy hours, the atmosphere and the fun.  I don't know, maybe I am a nut, but I'm looking forward to the challenge.

Maybe my sign came last year and I pushed it to the back of my mind and tried really hard to get my old life back.  My old life that I blamed for my issues at the time, the life I vowed to change.  I haven't changed it very much.  I haven't been the change I want to see in this world.  I've been the same person I used to be trying hard to be someone else.  Let Go is the best advice anyone could have ever given me.

I'll let you know how it works out!